Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Today's fortune: August 2, 2011

Today's fortune: Don't be surprised by the emergence of undiscovered talents!

This fortune could be interpreted one of two different ways. First, it could refer to talents you haven't discovered within yourself; or it could refer to talents that are about to be discovered by others.

On the front of the former, I'm hoping this fortune refers to the fact that I have undiscovered ukelele-playing talents. Jamie is (hopefully) buying me a ukelele for my birthday in a month and a half, and I'm hoping I can take it out of the box and play a tune with just a few days' practice.

Concerning the latter - where your own talents are yet to be discovered by others - I made a huuuuuge, A1, top-notch husband mistake today. And boy, did I ever pay a price.

Jamie and I cuddled when I came home from work today. Nothing dirty, we just laid down on the bed and cuddled for a little while. It was wonderful. During the cuddle session, as Jamie lay with her head nestled in the nook of my arm, I asked her a question based on this fortune. A simple question. Or at least I thought it was a simple question. I didn't know what I actually asked was the dumbest question ever uttered by a human being. Here's what I asked:

"Do you have any hidden or undiscovered talents?"

Without a moment's hesitation, Jamie withdrew her head from my nook and gave me the evil stare I've come to know so well. "What do YOU think my talents are, Matt?" she said, her voice cutting through all the oxygen in the room.

I fumbled around for a few seconds until she said, "Are you saying I don't have any talents?"
"No, honey, of course not," I said. "It's just that you have too many to list." Smooth. Or so I thought. Finally she got to the heart of the matter.

"We've known each other for ten years and you have to ASK me what my talents are?" she said, a smile creeping onto her face to let me know that I was going to be allowed to live one more day.

Even though I had been granted a reprieve, she still expected an answer to a question of her own: "If one of my talents was going to be 'discovered' by somebody and it could make us rich, what talent would it be?"

I thought about it for a minute, then the answer came to me. It was so obvious.

"Without a doubt," I said, "your sense of humor. You are the funniest person I know. And it's not just that you're funny; it's that you make people happy just by being around. Everybody feels warm and comfortable, and everybody smiles when you're near. I think you could be a comedy writer, or even a comedian. But beyond that, even if we don't ever make a dime off your sense of humor, I think you'll be remembered as a genuinely funny person. And that's more valuable than all the money in the world."

Smooth.

She glared at me for a few more seconds, then her eyes softened, and she said, "I accept that answer." She laid her head down gently on my arm and we both started laughing.

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